पंडित जी की तोंद
पंडित जी की तोंद

आज पड़ोस में फिर कोई मरा
और फिर शुरू हुआ गरुड़ पुराण,
हर पन्ने पर था सिर्फ़
ब्राह्मण को दान ब्राह्मण को दान,
पंडित जी की तोंद थी गजब
पुराण के पन्ने जाएं चपक,
दान का भोग खाते खाते
थोड़ा बहुत तो पेट आ ही जाता,
ऐसा बोल कर पंडित
तोंद पर हाथ घुमाता हाथ घुमाता.
मैंने पूछा पहले पन्ने से
सीधे चौथे पर क्यों आये,
उम्र हो चली है बेटा
दिखता नहीं सही से हाय!
मतलब तो समझने से है
चाहे पढ़ लो दाएं बाएं,
पंडित जी ने बोला बेटा
दस दिन चलेगा यही गान,
सोना चांदी आटा चावल
कपड़े बिस्तर कर दो दान.
जाने वाला तो चला गया
अब उसकी सिर्फ़ याद आएगी,
दान करोगे बेटा तो
उसकी आत्मा सुकून पायेगी,
मैंने बोला पंडित जी
वो आत्मा तो अब कहीं और होगी,
चारपाई की चाहत में
अधर में थोड़ी ना लटकी होगी.

ऐसा सुन पंडित जी ने
दिया क्रोध का परिचय,
उत्तर ना दे पाने पर
भर दिया मन में संशय,
ऊंघ रही थी
भीड़ में बैठी एक महिला,
पंडित जी की गूँज ने
नींद को उसकी दिया हिला,
माँ समझ गयी देखकर
बेटे का मुँह क्यों गया उतर,
पंडित जी के पास नहीं है
उसके प्रश्नों का कोई उत्तर,
फिर आयी खाने की बारी
पंडित ने साफ़ की खीर सारी,
बोले वैसे तो मैं
ज्यादा कुछ खाता नहीं,
पर बिना खीर लपेटे
रहा भी जाता नहीं,
कब तक चलेगा ये सिलसिला
नहीं कुछ अब कह सकते,
कुछ का हाल बुरा है खा खा कर
कुछ भूक में मारे मारे हैं भटकते,
जाते जाते पंडित जी को
माँ ने दिया दक्षिणा और दान,
और भाइयों इसी के साथ
संपन्न हुआ गरुण पुराण.
फिर आयी तेरहवीं की बारी
और तेरह पंडितों ने कर ली तैयारी…
मानस ‘समीर’ मुकुल
“I’m taking my blog to the next level with Blogchatter’s My Friend Alexa – #MyFriendAlexa.”
I would love to hear your feedback on this poem. Do share in the comments section. You can read other poems here.
क्या बात है, ये तो हास्य कवी सम्मेलन के लिए बनी है
कितने दिनों बाद विनोद से भरी ये बढ़िया कविता पढ़ने को मिली
काका हाथरसी की याद दिला दी आपने.
सच्चाई का व्यंगात्मक चित्रण – Too Good
Hehe… I am glad ki you liked this one. An attempt at something new. Trying to say something deep thru light humor… Hope it reaches 🤗🤗😊😊 thank you so much.
Kya baat hai hasya kavi bahot khoob! Serious baat pe humor daalna koi aapse seekhe. This was something new from your pen and loved reading it. Keep them coming.
Haha are itna acha bhi nhi. But dil se thanks for appreciating this one. Was trying something new with this. Glad it is reaching out as was intended.
Ultimate with harsh reality
Thank you so much sirji. Keep visiting 😊👍🏼
वाह क्या बात है…सुंदर कविता और ऐसा सिर्फ़ हमारे इंडिया में ही देखने को मिलता है।
बहुत धन्यावाद आभा जी I आप समय निकाल कर आए I सही कहा आपने भारत भरा पड़ा है ऐसे उदाहरणों सेI
वाह। हास्य-व्यंग्य से भरपूर, अत्यंत रोचक प्रस्तुति, हास्य कवि मानस!
बहुत बहुत धन्यवाद ज्योति जीI अच्छा लगता है जब कोशिश को सराहा जाता हैI ऐसे ही प्रोत्साहित करते रहिए।
I spend the longest time on your posts trying to read and understand Hindi 😛
Thanks for visiting. My apologies for all the trouble caused. Hopefully it will help in your Hindi getting better. 😊👍🏼😬
Haha.. Can’t stop smiling. I remember watching haysa Kavi samelan with my parents.. Loved your take on something very serious …hansi hansi mein aap bahut kuch Kaha gayee.
Thank you so much for appreciating the write up. I am glad it brought a smile… Koshish to ye hi thi ki hansi hansi me kuch gambhir kaha jaye 😊👍🏼
Thoda thoda samah aaya..sorry I am a South Indian..hindi nahi aati lekin panditon ke pet ke baare mai to pata hai 🙂
Koi bat nahi… English me bhi post hai Harjeet ji blog pe… Ap koi bhi padh sakte… Thank you so much for visiting. 😊👍🏼
Hilarious! Great satire once again. Reminds me of those kavi sammelans.
Though ironically I’ve always met poor pandits and Brahmans…maybe that is why the dakshina and kheer means so much for them.
Haha… Then I guess you have come across some genuine ones aur may be ap itni Pooja nhi karate. Thanks for liking the write up and thanks for the constant support.
You capture the right emotion everytime and that too in poetry, I am a fan!
Wow… Andhera ho gaya nhi to dekhta ki aj suraj kidhar se nikla tha….jo log hamare prernasrot hai wo fan banenge tab to matlab kuch sahi likh rahe honge 😬😊👍🏼 thank you so much for making the day 🤗😊
Title ne hi face pe smile la di thi aur yeh expected nahin ki this poem will have reality and not fiction. Good one!
Hahaha… Thanks bhai. Wanted to convey some harsh realities thru humor.
That is the reality – harsh but true! Nicely written.
Thank you so much Tina ji 😊👍🏼
hahaha brilliant and reflective of the real scenario!
Thank you so much for liking this write up. Keep visiting. 😊😊
I did read it and trying to understand it better. Being a corporate slave, I realise how much I did lose touch with Hindi which was my favorite in school having done various examinations and studying it beyond class… Thanks for taking the efforts in writing 🙂
Thanks for taking the effort and apologies for making you go through a Hindi post. Have tried to keep it utmost simple. Still many thanks for reading. 😊👍🏼
That is a brilliant take …liked that part जाने वाला तो चला गया
अब उसकी सिर्फ़ याद आएगी,
दान करोगे बेटा तो
उसकी आत्मा सुकून पायेगी,
मैंने बोला पंडित जी
वो आत्मा तो अब कहीं और होगी,
चारपाई की चाहत में
अधर में थोड़ी ना लटकी होगी.
Haha… Thank you so much. Koshish to ye hi thi ki kuch kaha jaye humor ke thru. I am glad you connected and liked it 😊🤗👍🏼
This poem reminds me one panditji …seriously very well written!!
Glad you related to it. That was the aim through humour. Thanks for appreciating 😊👍🏼
Absolute realty check. Written in a wonderful humorous manner. Loved it.
Thank you so much for liking it mam. Really appreciate 😊👍🏼
This reminded me of my MIL’s 13 days when the Panditji used to come and read the garud puran everyday and fill us all with fear and despair for not doing enough for them! My Dad is made of a different mould. We donated sums of money to orphanages when my Mom passed away. Panditji only for pujas. Their tond is well taken care of anyway! 🙂
Thanks Varsha ji for visiting, reading and commenting. Many thanks 😊👍🏼
True for some pandits. I wish all should understand and feed the poor on such occasions.
Thank you so much for connecting with the poem. Keep visiting.
Such an entertaining post, Manas. I could literally imagine the Panditji in the poem. You have ensured the poem is brimming with humour.
Thank you so much Dipali ji for such lovely and kind words. Means a lot. Keep visiting 😊👍🏼
A funny poem well written that made us laugh while reading through the lines. Mae kuch zydaa likthi nahi hoon. Na haskae jaana be nahi jathihoon.😂
Thank you so much for liking the poem. 😊👍🏼
Brings back memories of pundits who come home. Good one. #tmmreads
Thank you so much for appreciating the poem 👍🏼😊
Good one. Hilarious and sarcastic. Thanks to sharing. Enjoyed reading this piece.
Thanks sirji for loving this piece 😊👍🏼
Hey this is such a deep n hilarious satire, keep them coming
Thank you so much Roma ji for the appreciation 😊👍🏼
Ha Ha Ha … I could not stop laughing while reading the entire poem. Very keen observation skills to each minute mannerisms and the sarcasm is hilarious but you have highlighted the true facts.
I am glad you liked it. Wanted to bring out the reality through humor. Thanks for visiting.
enjoyed the poem! it is not easy to write satire, but you have done very well indeed!
Thank you so much 😊👍🏼